Is There Ever Such a Thing as Too Much Jewelry?

I was at my parents' house watching the MSU football game. They had this guy on during the game, and he used to play for the Spartans. Don't ask me what his name was because that's like asking me how many times I sneezed last week.

Anyway he had a giant diamond in both ears. My mom commented that the diamonds were so big that they had to be fake. I disagreed and told her that I bet they were real diamonds (we're talking at least 2 1/2 carats). She asked how he could afford such diamonds when he was still in college. My Dad reminded her that he wasn't in college anymore (they just told us that at the bottom of the screen, but she didn't see it). This guy now plays for the NFL, so he can afford big diamonds I guess.

So, then my mom changed strategies on us. She accepted the fact that the diamond earrings were probably real and that this guy could afford them. Now she wanted to know why someone would want such big diamond earrings. She suggested that they would look better in some sort of setting perhaps with other jewels. Even then, she said, they would still be quite gaudy. I mean, she's got a point. Unless you're the queen of England, it's a little pretentious to wear such big diamonds even if you can afford them. Somehow I don't think that this NFL player had considered any of this though.

It was at this point that my Dad got all frustrated and piped up with what may be the funniest comment ever to come out of his mouth. He simply said, "It's bling."
My mom looked confused. She said, "What?"
"Bling, that's what it's called. He's got bling on."
"Oh," she said.
That seemed to be the answer she had been looking for all along.

Next week we're going to teach my mom about crunk cups.